Jan 19, 2014

No Title , Any Suggestions? (explicit language)

It seems I always found myself in a catch 22. The lesser of the two evils you could say. Evil is evil don't you agree. But how much evil disturbs you to the point your conscious bothers your soul and you can't shake that feeling. Does anybody know what I'm talking about? I guess not. You just sit there and read all about it. Then you nod yes I've been there. Or what on earth is this chic talking about? He or she might say but for the grace of God there goes I. Well this is I, when your life has been spinning & spinning it's more than out of control. Wouldn't you think so? Literally, you would think it's gone and your days are numbered.  Each of our days are numbered whether you like it or not bytches. But what makes life a bitter bytch is when you have not enjoyed all that you could have possibly enjoyed. When you have not felt love as you feel you should have felt it. Hope I'm making sense of this. To you , perhaps, maybe, somewhat, or none at all. What the fuk! Don't mind me like the rest of the people in this world. And what makes it good is too see all the evil that surrounds me even the evil within. At least it was forseen. Maybe in a stare, that awkward hand shake, when he or she looks away, at the cloudy sky when the stars doesn't shine. Oh what about those sudden bumps, squeaks in the middle of your fantastic dreams. They never occur during those nightmares when its after you and if you yell noone will hear you moving around in bed. I mean noone! Because you are all alone. Nobody cares until it taps on their freaking door without an invite. Sit its azz down on the  sofa to stay until you break down. And finally, you scream loudly Go To Hell to everybody whose wronged you. And you holla fuk you to those who never did you right. Feeling sorry for yourself is not a lie but an azz whoopin truth. Let's face it some get it together and others never do. It may be me or you, you and you. I'm walking away now, the invisible woman you could never acknowledge. You like my whistling as my footsteps become light as a feather. One day.... who am I kidding. One day you'll see. I'm two steps ahead of you. Aren't you a lucky bastard? I thought so a few years ago. Now my thoughts are very different.  The christian community would tell me to "Resist" but I don't have any brakes. So they run from me like a bunch of hypocrites. And I turn the trigger finger towards me laughing and saying, "I Told You So."


jhp©2013

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